Pride Month Starts Next Week and The Rainbow Beast Demands Your Children

June is almost here, which means the corporate spasm of rainbow flag-waving is about to commence with all the subtlety of a Vegas drag show crashing a funeral. Pride Month, the holiest month in the calendar of Ba’al worship, is not content with simply your tolerance of them. Tolerance was the Trojan horse. The beast has now kicked down the gates, marched into the public square, and has begun licking its chops at your children.

You’ve seen it—on cereal boxes, children’s clothing displays at Target, bank ads on Hulu and Netflix, and, of course, in every single government agency pretending this rainbow orgy is a civil rights movement rather than a well-dressed pagan bacchanal.

And for thirty days straight, you will be force-fed the gospel of sexual self-deification, preached by everyone, from men in stilettos to bureaucrats in HR departments. And woe to those who dare roll their eyes.

Television becomes completely unwatchable. Not because of bad acting or lazy writing—although there’s certainly that—but because every other commercial wants you to believe that two bearded men in lipstick adopting a child is not only normal, but beautiful. It’s Hallmark, but filmed in Gomorrah. Disney, Netflix, Nickelodeon—pick your poison. They aren’t even pretending anymore. The subtext has become text, and the text is a rainbow-colored manifesto screaming: